Dancing with Wolves
By Fr. Gus Carter
2 /27 /05

The Academy Awards being given out this evening reminds me of one of the most honored films in the past: "Dances with Wolves." Early in the movie the hero of the story sees a wolf prowling about die encampment on the Western frontier. He takes careful aim at the animal. Then struck by the "beauty of the wolf, he lays aside his rifle. He names the animal he spared Two Socks after its white front paws. Thus the man befriends the wolf. The animal remains wild and untamed yet stays connected with the soldier who has a gentle spirit and a welcoming heart. The animal's hanging around the man looks something like a dance. Hence the Indians name the hero "Dances with Wolves."

The Gospel of the woman at the well typifies the interior life of those who would follow Jesus. He invites the woman into conversation. She responds reluctantly but is intrigued by Jesus offer of living water. He reminds her that she really is not married to the man she is living with. His knowledge of her personal life opens her to who he is. She recognizes the truth of what Jesus is saying. She believes in Jesus, wants to become his follower and desires to bring others to hear his message.

Many people desire an intimate relationship with Jesus. Often they do not follow up on that desire which is really an invitation from the Lord. I think a major obstacle to interior prayer is the fear that many have of facing the truth about themselves. When we quiet ourselves to hear Jesus, thoughts arise that make a person uncomfortable. We all have a certain resistance to unpleasant thoughts about ourselves.

We can think of thoughts that are unwelcome as our wolves. The unpleasant side of ourselves has been labeled our "shadow." From our upbringing certain actions are hardly allowed even to enter our minds. Yet the great psychiatrist, Carl Jung, maintained that our "shadow" is ninety percent gold. There are many untapped resources in our "shadow." To explore our "shadow" and to make friends with it becomes an energizing force for good in our lives.

Humans generally blame others for their personal problems. Yet our attitudes and behavior, our anger and fears, our distorted perceptions are the greatest threats to our peace and depth of living. These degrade and deform our relationships in ways that prevent us from loving. It is well known that what we hate most in others gives us the best clue of our own besetting faults. Most often individuals hate those faults in others rather than recognize them in themselves. However, what we hate in ourselves contains energies that help us be effective persons. For example, it is common to hate pride in others. Selfish pride surely accounts for much human misunderstanding and unfair competition.

Within our pride is the good sense that we have value. To acknowledge our personal assets gives us a way to thank God for his gifts in our lives.

We prepare to use these gifts lovingly. Facing our own weaknesses makes us more tolerant and compassionate towards the shortcomings of others.

In a class I was teaching a woman said, "Whenever I feel jealous, I ask myself, 'How am I not giving myself credit?" Jealousy comes from a fear that we are not as good as others. Getting in touch with our envy becomes a way of realizing that the goodness in each person is also meant to enhance the lives of others.

One more of Jung's teachings is that when we see the good in others, it is because, in some way, we have the same quality within ourselves. Acknowledging the good in others aids us in claiming what is also in ourselves. The Gospel says that we must lose our lives to gain them. Making the effort to see the good in others helps us take possession of those same qualities in ourselves.

Dancing with wolves can be a way of encouraging us to love our enemies. They become to some degree our friends. An environment of love makes transformation of ourselves and of others possible. Relationships can be healed and reconciled. Even so-called enemies can be powerful instruments of awareness and growth. We all need the love and support of friends. But just as surely we need our "enemies," those who expose our shadow side, who point out our self-absorption, who wont let us get by with our egocentricity. Our enemies, if we allow them, can be our truest, most faithful friends, for they call us to holiness of heart and soul.